Just as there are noteworthy examples of excellent college essays that admissions offices like to publish, so are there cringe-worthy examples of terrible college essays that end up being described by anonymous admissions officers on Reddit discussion boards. While I won't guarantee that your essay will end up in the first category, I will say that you follow my advice in this article, your.
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Why to avoid it: In general, writers should strive to show, not tell, readers what is happening in the book. By strongarming readers into feeling specific, manufactured emotions, you are taking away their freedom to experience the story in a way that is reflective of their background and experiences.
I would like to write a book where the good guys are the ones who have to kill children. The antagonist system is all-around harmful, but the better side is made of several different ideologies and a few of those decide it's fine to blow up a corrupt official's family house (doesn't have to be a mansion, the antagonistic society doesn't have to be large-scale corrupt).
There’s also the seminal A Season On The Brink that kicked off a series of terrific insider books by John Feinstein about contemporary American sports, Friday Night Lights, The Miracle of St. Anthony, Cinderella Man, The Blind Side, One Shot At Forever, The Last Best League, Meat Market, Moneyball, Shoeless Joe, Fifty-Nine in ’84, Levels of the Game, Best Seat In The House, Forty-Eight.
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You should avoid the word saw; characters shouldn't shrug, or smirk, or clench their fists; events shouldn't happen 'suddenly'; you should avoid adverbs; you should avoid the word said; you should avoid the passive voice; you should show, not tell - but not when it comes to using the weather or body language to show how people are feeling, no don't do that.
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